How to Not Give a Crap

Someone noticed the other day how I don't give a crap what people think of me--to some extent lol. It was then it hit me that I really, for the most part, don't care what people think of me. I mean of course I do a little bit, but I consider myself a very confident, outgoing, bubbly person. I wanted to share with all of you my care free ways of life, the I don't give a crap what people think of me. So here are my top 5 ways to say screw you to the world of people who judge others.

1) YOU ARE UNIQUE!!! Embrace it because you only have one life to live and let me tell you, it is not fun pretending to be someone you're not. If you want to be crazy and weird, so be it! The trick to not giving a crap lies in confidence and the only way to truly learn to be confident is to embrace your uniqueness. I personally think unique and different people are cool because you see way too many average people around. I know it may seem hard to try and embrace your uniqueness, but try and take baby steps. Start with being open about the kind of music you secretly like or a hobby you're interested in.

2) BE FERRIS BUELLER AND LIVE IN THE MOMENT!! If you feel like doing something a little out of your comfort zone, take that opportunity and go with it. If life is leading you in a certain direction, take that chance/risk and do something new. Try new food or new clothing. The more small risks you take, the more courageous of a person you become. That courage, in my mind, leads to more confidence and allows you to really embrace yourself and not care what other people think. Now, just because I said take risks, please don't do something really crazy like go get a tattoo. I mean, I'm saying stuff like ask out the guy you like for coffee, try a new hairdo, or go ziplining.

3) DO WHAT YOU LOVE...I promise you that you will not regret it! Doing what you love not only allows you to be happy, but it also gives you a sense of confidence. If you love and know you are good at something, you will feel better about yourself and thus feel more confident. Go play basketball, film stuff/take photos or go cook something delicious!

4) HAVE PEOPLE AROUND YOU WHO LIKE YOU FOR YOU! Having a good social group is a must for life. The people you hang around with the most should be people who encourage you to be yourself and be different. Seek out friends who have that attitude or who have those same different interests. It is so important to be comfortable around your friends before you can be truly comfortable with being yourself in front of the whole world.

5) OWN IT!!! Seriously when it comes down to it, we really only get to live once. So own it! Own what you got and what you want. Just trust your gut and your instincts. We all have things that makes us our own person and what makes people love us. In the end, people really do appreciate those differences. No one just wants a plain, boring, average person. So take risks, live life to the fullest and SMILE. If you make a mistake, don't look back and dwell on it. I know what to many people, including myself, who do this. Just look at it as a learning experience and make sure to not repeat the mistakes. This is all a part of growing up. So just have fun while you are young. Work hard and play hard because we only get one life to live. So work it and OWN IT because you are all awesome people! REMEMBER THAT!

Hope all of these tips helps everyone out there who struggles to not care what others think. So here's to not giving a crap!

Love,

Alexa

UNDERSTANDING EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE PEOPLE PART I

Although I am young, throughout my years of dating boys I have come across what some people may call emotionally unavailable guys. These types of guys are very hard to spot at the beginning, which in turn makes it easy for a dangerous behavior pattern to form. 

Emotionally unavailable people will appear to be available at the beginning by showing certain behaviors that you are most likely to never see again. For example, going the extra mile for you to show they care like buying you chocolates or roses or even driving a distance to see you. These behaviors will eventually stop quite early on in the relationship, usually within the first couple of months. Once these people feel they have you, they usually stop putting in the same effort they used to. This is because these types of people don't want to get emotionally close or sometimes physically close to the other person with usually a fear of something. 

Unavailable people are usually people who have suffered traumatic experiences or come from an environment where they would eventually fear becoming close with someone in the future. Due to this, these people put up extreme walls that are nearly impossible to break. 

They use the beginning stages to woo you so you are so overwhelmed with the amount of attention you are receiving that you don't question why they aren't really opening up to you. Then once they feel they have won you over, the stop the wooing process and back away a little in fear that you may start prying into their lives and finding out more about them. 

This whole process can repeat itself many times until the other person finally gets fed up and does something about it. Now to set the record straight, unavailable people usually aren't consciously making these actions. In fact, most of these behaviors are very subconscious and these people aren't truly aware of what they are doing. 

As for how to try and fix an emotionally unavailable person, you can't. That's the unfortunate and hard truth. If you keep coming back, they keep pushing and pulling. The problems that unavailable people have can only be solved with therapy or them realizing they have a problem and fixing it themselves. Thus, if you are in an emotionally unavailable relationship, YOU ARE NOT THE REASON THEY ARE ACTING THIS WAY, IT IS THEIR OWN PROBLEM. For more on this issue, I will be posting a few more blog posts about this as it is such a huge topic. For questions leave comments on this post.

For signs of an emotionally unavailable person check this out: http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/how-to-spot-emotionally-unavailable-men/

For further reading check out the book Mr. Unavailable and The Fallback Girl: http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/my-books/mr-unavailable-and-the-fallback-girl-book-one/ 

Welcome to Naked Lunch, my blog for advice on everything beauty, fitness, college and relationship related! Most of you reading this blog may think, "how can she possibly be giving advice to people when she is only 18?" However, even though I am so young I actually have a lot of experience in life and would love to be able to share some of my knowledge with you all. My interest in beauty began when I was 13. While browsing through YouTube, I discovered the large beauty community that exists on the internet. I've been following various people on YouTube for many years now as well as reading Cosmopolitan and Seventeen Magazine. Through reading these magazines, I discovered that I really enjoy researching beauty, fitness, and relationships. Also with my own experiences in relationships, I have come to really try and understand why people do the things they do and how to correct some of those behaviors. My goal with this blog is to share everything I've learned with the public. I want to be able to help people not just in their relationships, but with their overall beauty. I hope you all enjoy my new blog and have a very Happy Belated New Year!